When I was younger my family always played the song "Amazing Grace." I have always thought it was a beautiful song. But, I never really connected with the lyrics until now and on my journey through this fight. "I once was lost, but now am found, Was blind but now I see." Yes we all lose stuff both physically and figuratively. Before I got diagnosed I was going through a really hard time because my body and emotions were changing. For example, I was getting bullied by people who I thought were my friends, over something that I could not control. But, that's another blog topic for a different day. But anyways, I was blinded and just lost. And by going through this really tough journey, I have come to see more things and value more things than before(so I was blind, but now I see). In someways I am still more innocent than others but in other ways I am way more mature and grown up because of the tough and rough things I have experienced and struggled with. For example, other kids do not have to worry about things like signing a DNR and making the decision about if you want to keep going or not. But in other ways, like having their first kiss or first love, I am less experienced than that because I have not gotten to that point in my life yet. Even though my life took a complete turn upside down, I have now found the true value of things and relationships and friendships. I used to feel so alone and vulnerable and scared not knowing what to do with myself and just taking each day as a struggle. I am not saying that this sickness that I have is a blessing, but it for sure has opened my eyes to more things and meanings and values in life. It is kind of like the saying sweet dream and a beautiful nightmare. "Through many dangers, toils and snares We have already come
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far And Grace will lead us home."
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